The phase when unfiltered words make you laugh, school drop-off makes you cry, and life becomes a stage where you kid shouts, “Look At Me!”
Kindergarten:
PARENT RESOURCE CENTER
While previously a kid might have been one adorable toddler drawing the attention of multiple adults, they are now a classroom with multiple kids---some even as cute and smart as they are. At school, at church, or on the soccer field, one thing is true: They want your undivided attention. So give it as often as possible.
Give some undivided attention.
This means less time for play, more early-morning alarm clicks, and a higher demand for focused attention. While kids at this age thrive on routine and predictability, they also crave opportunities to have a little unstructured play, a chance to skip and run, to throw and catch, and to use their imagination.
Adjust for a cultural shift--school.
By this age, a child can speak in sentences…and long, wandering monologues. But you will be amazed and entertained by all the profound and uncensored things they say, like, “How did you get the wrinkles out of you hair?” and, “You’re talking so much I can’t hear you.”
Get ready for memorable statements.
the Kindergarten Phase
welcome to
water regularly
In Elementary:
Emphasize engaging in your child's interests to demonstrate trusting in God's character. Water the seeds and, as they sprout up, cultivate community and nurture their sense of discovery to prepare your child for what comes next.
In the Kindergarten phase, your role is to engage their interests.
- Elementary schoolers think like a scientist | You help them learn when you… give them concrete examples.
- Elementary schoolers want to know, “Do I have your attention?” | You capture their heart when you… improve their abilities.
- Elementary schoolers are motivated by fun | You coach them when you… play on their level.
Think. Want. Motivate.
Rhythms & Responses
Make the most of Each moment (Eph 5:16)
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Why Rhythms & Responses Matter:
Look therefore carefully how ye walk, not as unwise, but as wise; redeeming the time, because the days are evil. (Eph 5:15–16)
In other words: Life is short & the days are evil. Days, however, are also opportunities.
Our English word opportunity comes from a Latin word meaning, “toward the port,” suggesting that a ship can take advantage of the winds and tides to navigate safely toward the harbor.
The brevity of life makes it all the more important to make the best use of the opportunities God gives us. Much like a ship, in life's short journey, there are winds and tides that can be leveraged for a good purpose.
In Paul’s time, when Roman persecution was on the way, how foolish to waste opportunities to win the lost when soon those opportunities might be taken away! In the moments we have with our children, this is why our rhythms and responses matter: that by the grace of God, we could redeem the time we have, no matter how fleeting or frustrating.
Be a counselor. Strengthen you relationship through heart conversations at the end of the day.
Bed TIME
Be a teacher. Establish values with intentional conversations while you eat together.
Meal TIME
Be a friend. Interpret life during informal conversations as you travel.
Drive TIME
Be a coach. Instill purpose be starting the day with encouraging words.
MORNING TIME
be wise with your time.
"What did Jesus do when he went to Zaccheus' house?"
Talk about what your kindergartner learns at church throughout the week.
"You can trust God no matter what."
"Let’s make dinner for Mrs. Paula. She doesn’t feel well."
Involve them in serving friends and neighbors.
be wise with your words.
This year you will provoke discovery so your child will trust God’s character and experience God’s family.
Your kindergartner is quickly learning the have its and routines that make your family work. Make church a priority, but don’t let it be the only time you talk about faith.
Talk about God as you
go about your day.
show authentic faith
– Proverbs 22:6
Train up a child in the way he should go;
even when he is old he will not depart from it.
Our aim as parents
Child Developments & Change
Your Child's Growing Capabilities (1 Cor 3:2)
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Why Development & Change Matters:
But I, brothers, could not address you as spiritual people, but as people of the flesh, as infants in Christ. I fed you with milk, not solid food, for you were not ready for it. And even now you are not yet ready. (1 Cor 3:1-2)
At one point in time, you had to start out with the basics. As you learned and you grew, you were able to handle more difficult things. This is why Paul compares himself to a mother in places like 1 Cor 4:15 and 1 Thess 2:7.
A major part of intentional Christian parenting means giving your children what they need when they need it. By being aware of their milestones and tendencies, you can adjust their goals with their capabilities.
Then, as they near their next milestone, you're there waiting to celebrate, and you're ready to give them more. A good parent knows when their children need to grow. Instead of just leaving them with milk, like Paul, we should desire to give them more and more as they become ready for it.
As your child grows, this is why you need to navigate the changes well: that by the grace of God, you could help them stretch and learn to know the Gospel at every age. To do this, you can't just meet them where they are, you must know how to gently push them on where they need to go.
- Tends to be optimistic
- Can be fanatical about the truth
- Benefits from relaxation techniques (take a deep breath)
- Expresses feelings better through play and art rather than words
- Deals with fear and anxiety by distracting themselves
- Highly sensitive to harsh criticism, tone, and body language
emotionally
- Wants to please and help adults
- Has a hard time asking for help
- Needs guidance taking turns and losing well
- May show some (not much) gender preference for playmates
socially
- Can focus on one activity for 5-15 minutes
- Recognizes and names numbers, shapes, and colors
- Knows the difference between need vs. want and real vs. pretend
- Doesn’t logically interpret cause and effect
mentally
- Loses incisor teeth between years 6-8
- Grows two to three inches & gains an average of five pounds
- Able to ride a bicycle , roller skate, and jump rope
- Draws a person with a body
- Needs 1-12 hours of sleep each night
physically
your child is changing...
In elementary, you are setting the stage for truth based on what is black and white, as well as creating habits that could last a decade.
Resources For This Stage
No matter how much you prepare, no matter how much you work, you're going to miss something. You're going to mess up. You're going to say or do something you regret. And yes, God can redeem even your short-comings as a parent.
To the best of our ability, we can hope that we use the tools given to us to be Godly parents, grandparents, and mentors. But thanks be to God that the salvation of the children in our care does not depend solely on us.
To play on Paul's words in 1 Corinthians 3, I ask: What then is a father? What then is a mother? One can plant, and one can water, but it is God who gives the increase.
So, as a parent, do what you can. And aim to do it well. But trust that God, who is able to do far more abundantly than all that you could ask or think, will be glorified throughout all generations, even yours.
God's got this.
This all might sound like a lot, but I can assure you...
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